


Five Things (on the Master's playlist)

by extryn



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Crack, Dark, Humiliation, Inappropriate Behavior, M/M, Songfic, Year That Never Was, off-screen violence, only as nasty as you think it is, yeah - mine
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-08
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-08-29 21:26:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8506006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/extryn/pseuds/extryn
Summary: Imprisoned aboard the Valiant, the Doctor doesn’t appreciate the Master's mixtape.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Because it's exam period, and it's 2am. Because this totally happened. I'm sorry, but it did. And you bet the Master made sure he did not miss a _single_ fucking beat. Sorry 'bout your childhood.

The Doctor’s face stung fiercely. He tried to catch his breath and simultaneously follow what the Master was saying - made difficult by the ringing in his ear. Wild, manic gestures, the line between anger and glee so blurred the Doctor honestly couldn’t tell anymore. He was so, so tired. His skin was young again, so sensitive and raw, his senses renewed into such clarity it made him want to scream with the intensity of it.

And then the song started for the forty-sixth time.

_“Hiya Barbie!”_

_“Hi, Ken!”_

_“You wanna go for a ride?”_

_“Sure, Ken.”_

The Doctor took a deep breath, counted a beat, and sang. ‘I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world.’ A breath. 'Life in plastic; it’s fantastic.’

The Master cupped a hand to his ear.

Louder, forcing his voice to come out clear and steady, 'You can brush my hair,’ the Doctor ran his hands down his body in a parody of seduction, 'undress me everywhere. Imagination, life is your creation–“

Head yanked brutally upwards by his hair, the Master spat the words against his neck. 'Come on, _Barbie_ , let’s go party.’

'I’m a Barbie girl,’ the Doctor hissed, ignoring the pain, mentally tapping out the beat as he sung. ’–life in plastic, it’s fantastic. You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere.’

’ _Lou_ -der, Doctor,’ the Master warned. He snapped his fingers across the Doctor’s eyes, keeping him in brisk time.

’– **_snap_ ** \- Imagination, life - **_snap_** \- is your creation–’

The grip in his hair became a sharp tug, throwing him to the ground. Sprawled on the parquetry, the Doctor barely managed to gather the words for the next verse. 'I’m a blonde bimbo girl, in a fantasy world,’ he gasped, 'Dress me up, make it tight, I’m your dolly.’

The Master pivoted, belting the lyrics gleefully, 'You’re my doll, rock and roll, feel the glamour in pink! Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky.’

Biting his lip, the Doctor lowered his gaze. 'You can touch, you can play,’ he sung tiredly, peering at the Master through his eyelashes, 'if you say I’m always yours. Oooh-oohooh…’

Despite the dancing, every bit as high-energy as he’d been this morning, the Master’s focus did not waver. Growing out of breath, the Doctor clenched his stomach muscles, biting out the last of the chorus, 'Imagination, life is your creation!’

The Master pretended to lasso him closer. 'Come on Barbie, let’s go party!’

Counting each millisecond of the meter, the Doctor forced himself up on shaking hands and knees - and with utter precision, chimed back, 'Ah, ah, ah yeah!’

'Come on Barbie, let’s go party,’ grinned the Master.

The Doctor cooed in an almost perfect imitation. 'Ooh-oohooh, ooh-oohooh!’

But the grin was souring, and the Doctor struggled to keep up and crawl simultaneously, swaying his hips with the beat - oh, right, _three_ , _two_ … 'Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please,’ the Doctor took an aborted breath, 'I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees.’

The Master seized the end of his tie, tugging the Doctor forwards against his hips, yelling, 'Come jump in, bimbo friend, let us do it again! Hit the town, fool around, let’s go party.’

Fighting for breath, the Doctor strained to force the words out - 'You can touch, y-you can play, if you say I’m always yours,’ and as his voice began to give out, 'you can touch, you can - _ah_ \- if you say ’m always yours!’

The Master’s lip curled, his fist releasing its hold. 'Come on Barbie, let’s go party.’

Knees, voice shaking, the Doctor coughed out his response. Hands caught his head and bodily spun him around, to face the bridge of the Valiant - the Doctor instinctively closed his eyes. ’ _Come on Barbie, let’s go party_.’

'Ooh-oohooh, ooh-oohooh,’ the Doctor yelled, furiously clenching his eyes shut.

'Come on, Barbie. Let’s go party,’ hissed the Master.

He wouldn’t mess it up. Not this time. 'Ah, ah, ah yeah!’

'Come on, Barbie, _let’s go party_.’

Not when he was so close. 'Ooh-oohooh, ooh-oohooh! I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world,’ the Doctor sucked in a breath, hearts beginning to race - 'Life in plastic, it’s fan- _tas_ -tic, you can brush my hair,’ and as coquettishly as he could stand, the Doctor pressed his face up against the Master’s leg, 'undress me every- _whe_ - _e_ - _ere_! Imagination, life is your creation, oh I’m a Barbie girl–’

Suddenly realising he’d sped up, the Doctor tapped a finger to find the beat, hoping desperately the Master hadn’t noticed. 'Life in plastic, it’s fantastic,’ he sung, with renewed clarity - and then forgot why he wasn’t looking. A fierce, overpowering wave of horror threatened to make him lose his place, but he was _so close_ , he could cry– 'Ah, ah, ah yeah!’

The Master’s eyes were blazing. 'Come on Barbie, let’s go party!’

Hearts hammering against his chest, the Doctor sung, 'Ooh-oohooh, ooh-oohooh!’

’ _Oh, I’m having so much fun!’_

The Master smiled down at him, speaking in time. 'Well, Barbie, we’re just getting started…’

__’_ Oh I love you, Ken! _’_  _

Breathless, the Doctor sank down on his heels. 'Please. No more. Please, Master, it’s enough.’

Above him came a hot, forced sigh. 'Leave the hands, start on the toes. But save the big toes for last, I want to see how long he can -  _ha_ , funny thing -  _stand_.’

'No, no,’ the Doctor begged, 'I got it right, you promised, I got it right this time…’

The Master drove a foot into his side, sneering down at him. 'Useless, hopeless idiot. How many _times_ does it take you to learn? And there’s no ” _oh_ “ in the last chorus.’

Tears sprung to his eyes, coming from somewhere beyond frustration, beyond pain. 'I’ll do better, I swear, please just let me try.’

'Very well,’ smirked the Master. 'With some _feeling_ , this time. But first,’ he waved a hand to the guards, and the Doctor grit his teeth through the wet crack of bone and Jack’s exhausted, broken moan, because he had no right to scream–

The music started again.

**Author's Note:**

> Next up...well, that's a secret. But I have a few more terrible ideas up my sleeve. Laughter, tears, hopes and fears!


End file.
